Don’t let Emotions or Assumptions Get in the Way of Health

Before i get into this, understand this is my blog that i let my personal emotions out.  I am an emotional person and I feel for everyone. I mean I apologize to a chair when I run into it. I feel the pain people go through which it doesn’t matter what side, if they feel pain so do I. So if I see a Cavalier suffering in pain, I feel it. I feel for breeders I know that have been depressed for a year over a Cavalier with SM. I also am very trusting and believe in the good in people. I don’t think this is a bad thing and I actually like that about myself but it can also lead to disappointment.



To people buying a puppy or adopting, it is so important to not let emotions get in the way because you feel someone is nice or you think this is a rescue. Find out for yourself who the person is, what the breeder does, and make your decision on facts not heart. www.cavalierhealth.com has a list of questions to ask a breeder.

That being said, I think everyone has the right to be heard especially pet owners. Recently I have felt it was more about politics than about the actual people who are going through this. I will not be used as a case to show how Cavaliers can suffer in pain. I don’t believe in calling out breeders especially if they have a cavalier with SM because I feel for them. I feel the pain of each heart beat, each shake of the head, each time I think of Ella’s future.

When a good friend who is a Cavalier owner, told me that Ella was depressed and there is nothing wrong with her. I was the one making her that way. SM is not a problem, and then said after someone sent an email with puppies in time for christmas that they are so cute I want one, I just can't think about it. After everything Ella went through and even to have the nerve to say her neurologist was making this up because she is fine and he wants money.


Thank you Dr. Brofman at Carolina Vet Specialists for treating Ella, for giving her acupuncture when she was in pain, for speaking to a group of Cavalier owners about SM Awareness (one that this person who was my best friend) did not attend not for money at all. For support and education. I can not thank him enough.  In fact she wanted to be removed from a list because she didn't want to think about or hear anything about Cavaliers, or meet-ups, because let's face it, it is not a fun topic. If you don't have a Cavalier going through pain, do enjoy the health and life of your loved one but please don't shut others out. So people may lose friends and people even pet owners can make one feel bad.



The fact remains that Ella is in pain and has to be managed on medication and to hear that my one best friend who was with me at night and has seen her in pain, told me when she was left with someone who witnessed a time she just wasn’t herself, that now people know I am not making this up. 

MAKING UP MY DOG IS SICK!


I don’t need to justify that Ella is sick. I don’t want to show people here you go you see this? However, I do not want to be blamed for her so called “depression” or told by a friend that SM is not a problem.



When Ella got attacked, I was actually going to pick up her Cavalier, I have never seen so many tears. How can you be so strong I was asked, well try living with a Cavalier with SM for the past year.



So I wanted to rant because recently I have been letting my emotions get in the way.



*SM is a problem and a true condition.

*CM can also cause pain.

*I am not going to feel like I have to justify how I feel and what I believe.

*I feel that breeders need to be supported and not grouped into one category.

*I think it is vital that Clubs get involved and people get involved in Clubs



No matter what people will still not listen even when a very close friend who cried several tears when she feared Ella would LOSE AN EYE. This is not life threatening like her SM, but it is so hard to look at such a pretty cavalier that now has one eye.



So now the tears are flowing again. I need to remember this. Awareness is key. Cavaliers are not the only breed. I don’t want to fight, I do think the only way to progress is to talk openly and effectively. But I am tired of feeling sad not because I may lose Ella but because people don’t want to listen, want to talk about breeders in general as a terrible thing, want to not be open about what they feel in fear of being misunderstood or twisted.



This is not the time for that. So I am laying it out there. I have been back and forth on things and felt one way and then another. I don’t think being negative or simply focusing on the wrong is going to do anything but I don’t think ignoring the problem or telling me I am the reason my Cavalier acts that way is.

Never doubt yourself, ask for a second opinion

This past week has been full of information with the wonderfull sm awareness event www.twolittlecavaliers.com that i give so much thanks for.

I want to talk about a friend that found out yesterday that her beloved cavalier has sm. My prayers are with her and i hope if she reads this or anyone else, i may not have the answers but i have an ear and can be there for you during this hard time. I want to share this not only because she is a friend but because of what she did. She got a second opinion because her gut told her something was wrong.

This week has brought awareness and i seen people ask my dog scratches does he or she have cm or sm? I can not tell you that but i can tell you what i wish i did thinking back on ella. Every dog or puppy does things (scratch, rub faces etc.) But i had a strong feeling there was more. I have told her story but i trusted my vet when he said i shouldnt worry. I doubted myself because people didnt see what i did. I know ella more than anyone else. So i should have not doubted my questions and asked for another opinion, which i eventually did.

So when a friend emailed me because she was concerned that there was something more and did not want to wait and see which a neurologist told her, i gave her ellas neurologists information. I dont think someone saying she doesnt look like she is in pain is good enough. That is because ella looked normal and fine to others. If you are concerned and think something is wrong, get another opinion, (not mine but a specialist).

I think ellas neurologist dr. Brofman is the best, the best to ella, i know, and thats what matters. She saw him and her cavalier had an mri and confirmed what she thought. Now i am not saying anything about the other one, just that it is never wrong to question.

To have surgery or not. That is up to each owner and each dog is different. There are no right or wrong answers. You do what you can and hope it is the best for your loved one.

I did that when i debated having ellas eye removed. I put off the surgery and scheduled an appointment in the future. The optomistrist is one of the best in the country. When he saw ella, he told me i made the right decision. He said he thought it was going to be terrible but he was pleasantly proven wrong. Even experts may not know what the future brings.

Sometimes you got to question and trust yourself.

Where would cavaliers be without responsible breeders? Think before you speak

I have a problem of saying things before i really think about it or come up with the facts. With the  two little cavaliers sm awareness event i have found that even though i have tried to get a lot of information this past year, there is still a lot i don't know and even now question. One thing i do know is that everyone is free to have their own opinion. I simply ask that people try to form their own opinions from getting information from several different sources.

I have said from the beginning, i can not tell anyone what is best for their dog. Each cavalier is different and treatment should be different, but i can only tell about ella and what i personally have learned.  I have said from the beginning, i never blamed ella's breeder. Each breeder is different, so before anyone places blame or negativity to breeders in general, i hope they would talk to one. If you learn that your cavalier has SM, then responsible breeders need this information and most likely are a good place to start. Unfortunately, people may come across denial or other things but great breeders would be there for support. They are the future of this breed along with pet owners supporting them.

I need to share how i came to learn the side of a breeder and not just from the book  for the love of ollie, but from a SM support group. I have heard  her talk about the pain she has to learn her girls have SM . How she has lost a line and a family she has cared about. How she will never breed or give someone a Cavalier before having and MRI on the one Cavalier she has left and praying that she is okay. Until she will have the MRI, is faced with the cost of having this done. The struggle to find a place to offer low cost MRI.  Should she give up on this one Cavalier? Well I think that since she is not breeding UNTIL she knows the results and can have her scanned, absolutely NO. She is one of the breeders trying everything they can to produce as healthy puppies as possible.  Her friends fought to get low cost MRIs, not because they wanted to make extra money but because they would not breed a Cavalier without doing everything possible to make sure they breed for health. Sure they probably don't want to make a loss (while a lot do) but they love the breed. Many people might say breeders are only to make money, but there are some that simply love the breed and want to do everything they can for the future.



Her friend does not talk about the six months on the phone struggling to get a better cost for them. They do what they can, hope others follow, and stay out of the light.  I now understand why.  I would not want to be questioned, looked down on, or anything else simply when I would be speaking out. 

So when faced with the problem of the cost of MRI, one person fought and got the cost lowered. Why do i feel its important to share this? I think its also important to support these breeders because without them, i am scared of who will be the ones breeding cavaliers. It is them that are the future with the support of the public and pet buyers.

It is extremely hard to breed healthy cavaliers and to see some still develop problems, but it is real easy to make assumptions before understanding more. If i was a breeder and was doing everything i could, yet still was being viewed in a negative light or questioned, i don't think i could handle it. So i am scared of what will happen if they feel that no matter what they do or try to do, its not ever going to be good enough. Should they give up and leave it to others that don't know as much?

Should i give up on ella and not want  another cavalier in my future? No. I never think or regret that ella came into my life. I have cried many tears but that is because she has such a strong place in my heart. I am thankful i had someone that brought her into my life.

Get involved. Talk to the clubs (they even have health clinics), gather information before buying a puppy, and as unfortunate as is sounds, never assume that no matter how much a breeder may try, there always is a risk of SM.

should people no longer breed cavaliers even though there is a risk no matter what they do of developing cm or sm? If people speak and say how could they do that?  Then that would mean there would not be any cavaliers. That is why it is tough for breeders that are responsible and care deeply about the breed. Even with the best, there are no guarantees. Puppy buyers should know this and be supportive of the ones being open and honest, doing everything they can.  They can also have their own opinion and say they should never be breed.

That would mean there would never be ella. 

"I LOVE this breed. I have had cavaliers since 1991 and I hope that I will never have to live a day without one. I want us to figure this SM thing out so that dogs like your precious Ella don’t have to live in pain. My hope is that there are lots of people that feel the same way we do and will jump on this band wagon to MRI their breeding dogs!!





Thank you for being a voice for the cavaliers, AND for taking the time to listen and understand the issues around SM—from ALL sides. There is no quick and easy solution. I think we all understand that. But the only way we’re going to get this figured out is by using the tools we have—and right now, the best one we have is MRI-ing!"

Take the time and listen or get more information before speaking about what a breeder did or did not do. Why not ask?

For the Love of Ollie, A Story that Comes from the Heart

"To the world you are just one, but to me, you are the world" is exactly how i feel about this book.  How can I possibly write a review of the book that means exactly that, the world to me? I have several pages of scribbled notes trying to try to say it just right, but I think its best to just let this come from my heart.

I need to tell the story of how this book brought awareness of SM to me and saved the most important thing in my life, Ella.  I did not know when I stumbled upon the website www.fortheloveofollie.com how important that day would be. I was trying to write a newsletter and  was looking up something to write about Cavalier Health back in April 2009. I saw the beautiful picture of a cavalier named Ollie and a book that says is a story of compassion and courage.  I saw that if you buy the book proceeds would go towards research for something called Syringomyelia so I thought I would buy it. Something called Syringomyelia would soon become something that I would soon become very familiar with because 6 months later she would be diagnosed with severe syringomyelia which I know call SM

April happened to be the same month Ella turned 3 and for that same newsletter I wrote about her birthday party. I did not understand why she seemed so tired recently and I thought she just must have played too long. Now I know there was a different reason for that.

The book tells a story from the heart from Sandy Smith (Ollie's Mom).  She tells about Ollie as a puppy which still puts a smile on my face but she also tells how she went through not knowing what was wrong with Ollie until she got a letter from her breeder telling her about a condition that she should know about.  I feel the same way about this book as she must have felt when she got that letter. Answers to a puzzle that you finally could put together.

SM awareness is so important to me because had it not been for this book, I would have not called in tears that one Saturday morning and demanded Ella see a neurologist.  I had talked to my vet about my concerns with Ella especially after reading this book because I knew that Ella was doing several things that the book said were symptoms.  We had already gone a year with thinking she had food allergies and ear infections. I even took her to the vet to have him watch her walk up the stairs because just looked funny.  He said he didnt see anything strange when she walked up the stairs, which could be because its not something she did all the time.  "Let's just wait and see because I dont think there is any reason to assume she has syringomyelia yet".

I thought I was crazy and maybe I was over reacting from reading the book until several months and visits later. It was a Friday in December and I had talked to him again about my concern because we eliminated food allergies but now he thought she could be allergic to smoke.  He gave some drops to numb her ears and said we should still not jump into conclusions. She was shaking her head so much it just wasnt normal. Yet it was not a concern and all my friends also thought i was over reacting.

The next day i went to my cousins house and was in the back yard and was going to do what Ella loves more than anything, throwing a ball.  When i threw it and she didnt move tears came down my eyes and i knew what i had known deep down a long time ago, I was not crazy at all.

The picture of him staring at his favorite toy a black plastic bowling ball popped in my head and I immediately ran home crying calling her vet but I spoke to his partner and she referred me to a neurologist to see first thing Monday morning.

The neurologist said he definately thinks she should get an MRI, i thought if most it would be mild but it wasnt.  The next two weeks she tried medication but it only got worse.

Had it not been for this book and I waited I dont know how much longer, I dont think Ella would be with me know. As i say those words tears are falling and that is why this book means so much to me.

When I read it after everything it has a deeper meaning. I feel like she is telling everything exactly how I felt. Each time something else comes to mind so my book is worn from tears stains and also from referring to different things.

This book is more than a story, it also has a lot of helpful information and the book has raised a lot of money to fund research for SM.

It also has a letter from Ollie's breeder who Sandy is so thankful for, who tells what it was like to learn about Ollie and his sister Maggie May had this condition. It was devastating because she felt the pain and how much sorrow she brought but Sandy did not blame her. In fact it was her who made her aware of syringomyelia.

This is a book is what SM awareness truly is and includes and touches everyone.  There is a lot of information now available on Syringomyelia but nothing quite sticks with you like a book with a picture of a cavalier named Ollie and his story.

Ollie, a cavalier king charles spaniel that will remain in my heart forever. Thank you for sharing your story to save another.

I would personally like to thank Sandy Smith who also reached out to me when I did not know where to go. She gave me the courage, strength, and helpful advice at a time when I was lost.

If you do anything this week, please buy this book. I promise you that you will never forget it!