Ella was diagnosed with Syringomyelia and taught me more in her short life about how to live life to the fullest, love with all your heart, and learn from each other.

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The moment I first held Ella, my world changed. She has touched so many people giving love as a therapy dog but now it is time to give back. No matter how hard she tries to give, her eyes show sadness and pain.

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

but mommy, i'm special too

When I was thinking of adopting elton, I was scared that no matter how perfect or special another cavalier was, they would never be as close to me as ella was. Would that be fair? Would I be able to give another cavalier enough love? I figured that there is always a special cavalier or dog that no dog or anyone will replace, but that should not mean that I will never have another.

Elton looks at me and his say, I need you too. I cry thinking about why have I not given up the fight for SM, when I have a little boy that gives me so much joy but he needs me in a different way.  I took him to the vet last Friday because it has concerned me about him chasing his tail. Yes, some think this is a cute quirk but I'm starting to feel sad. Is he still anxious with the adjustment? Have I not made the transition easy or have I not given him the classes and attention that he needs because he needs?

I decided to get a referal to a behavioralist. He is one of the best in the country. I think it would be good to talk to him to see if his behavior is related to OCD. I don't think I'm over reacting but I want to give him my all. I've been sad lately. He needs more activity than ella did but have I not gone on enough walks? I need to adjust things for him.

I have been talking about obedience training and getting involved with activites like agility and other things, but classes have just come out with a fall schedule.

I am sad because some family meet elton. They said that ella was just so special. I know she was but so is elton. He is different but he has his own special qualities.  I know I felt the same way but I started to get upset. Elton isn't ella but he is a ball of fire. Ella was extremely docile and inactive but a lot of that had to do with her SM. Elton needs more attention, stimulation and playtime. He can't sit at the front of the vet's office like ella but he can run, jump, dance and is a monkey.

My nephew saw his special quality when he stayed with them recently. He was so happy because he taught him a trick. He said he taught him to dance. He said he has to do it in the morning because he is "more wild". He could not say elton but called him "hellton". Yet he is just active and wants to play. He would run outside and go to the birdfeeder to make them all flock. He loves playing tug of war. He does all of these cute things but is never "bad". He just wants to play.

I am worried about his behavior a little bit because he growled and I don't know if something is going on. So my little munchkin is special too. He also has stolen my heart and I know we will learn together how to adjust to each other. He has made his place here and has his favorite toys and his own mark here. I couldn't imagine my home without him.

I miss my cavalier friends that I got to know because of ellas SM, but maybe I will meet others that can help me with learning how to train and what fun things we can do or I can to help stimulate his wild, active personality.

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